MURRAY: We used to come here all the time.
We were so in love.
For ten years, everything was perfect.
Oh, what was I thinking?
It all started to go wrong when I got promoted.
Bex, shall I serve up?
I'm so sorry, Lisa, it's just this new job. I'm sure he'll be here soon.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hi, Murray.
Oh.
OK.
Would the godparents please step forward?
Ugh! Before I knew it, I was working weekends.
- (PHONE RINGS) - Sorry.
Hi, Murray.
Oh, right.
I even managed to miss Valentine's night.
(PHONE RINGS)
I suppose sometimes you just lose sight of what's important in life.
I really hope it's not too late.
TANNOY: This is an Edinburgh Airport security announcement. Please remember...
I can't remember which is which now.
(LAUGHS)
It's difficult, isn't it?
I think I like this one best.
Really? D'you think that would work for a younger woman?
Well, I think so.
Sorry, I didn't mean to imply you weren't, er...
It's for my wife, she's 40 today, so...
Oh, not that 40's young, but it's younger than, um...
How old are you?
Don't feel you need to answer that.
- So you'll take this one? - Yes, please.
Cos what is young these days, anyway?
They say 50's the new 40, don't they?
40's the new 30.
- I'm 42. - Oh, really? Oh, well done, it's, er...
Well, that's why it's very helpful to get the advice of a 42-year-old
on what a younger woman of, er... 40 might like.
- Shall I put it in a bag? - Yeah, stick it in the old bag.
There, that old bag, that bag, not...
You know, your plane leaves in five minutes.
What?
Hi, Bex, it's me. Pick up if you're there.
No?
Look, really sorry, hon, bit of a problem with the flight,
so I'm going to have to miss your birthday breakfast and go straight to the office.
I know, I know, it's me making this phone call again,
but I'll see you later at home.
Love you. Oh, er, one more thing...
♪ Happy birthday to you... ♪
I'm gonna take the back route, mate.
Oh, no, no, left, it'd be quicker.
Honestly, just follow the signs to Brighton.
♪ Happy birthday to you... ♪
Don't worry, I've done this route before, you know.
No, you'll hit traffic at the lights.
♪ Happy birthday, dear... ♪
All right, but don't blame me.
I'm trying to sing Happy Birthday here.
♪ ... Bex
♪ Happy birthday to... ♪ No, left. Left! Left!
♪ ... you. ♪
I know it's me making this phone call again, but...
(SWITCHES PHONE OFF)
BEX: Dear Murray...
I'm... going away...
...for... for a bit.
Yes, I know it's short notice,
but I thought it would be nice if a few of her friends and family surprised her.
Yes, tonight.
All my love.
Bex.
Yes, it is last minute, but I've missed her birthday breakfast and...
Kind... regards.
Cheers.
I'll just put Bex.
Oh, Murray, thank God you're here.
Morning, Emma.
Everything OK?
A memory stick has gone missing with loads of Pentratech's data on it,
and IT are saying you're the last person to have it.
- Yeah, yeah, I've got it. - You... what?
I took it to Scotland with me. The investment conference.
Oh, God!
Oh, what a relief.
I thought you were in real trouble there.
No, everything's under control.
Oh, I want to kiss you.
Please don't.
No, no, not here.
Not right now.
- (LIFT DINGS) - Ah, the lift.
Saved by the bell...
of the lift.
Ripped By mstoll
I love your tie, by the way.
Thanks.
Got it from Bex, my wife.
- She's 50 today, isn't she? - 40, yes, yeah, yeah.
I'm actually organising a surprise birthday party for her.
Are you? Oh!
Yeah, well, she's been a bit down recently,
I think it's the big 4-0, you know, didn't want to celebrate at all.
The plan was for a night in with me and my famous poached salmon.
I love poached salmon! Can I have the recipe?
Yeah, well, it's just sort of poached.
There we go, Barney.
So, how many people are coming to the party?
So far, I've got 14, but I'm hoping for about 20-odd.
Oh, she doesn't deserve you, Murray.
I mean, I'm just saying she's...
you know, so lucky to have you.
And you going to all this effort, the party...
- (LIFT DINGS) - Oh, here we are, the fourth floor.
Yes, our floor.
My favourite floor.
Hi, Grant, er, about the party again.
I'm not checking up on you, I'm just seeing if you got the message.
I'm not being judgmental, I'm just...
There's no tone to my voice, Grant.
Look, if you can pick up some booze after work, that'd be great.
How can you take offence at the word "great"?
OK, fine, I'll pick it up myself!
No, I'm not cutting you off, I'm...
Grant!
(SIGHS)
Oh, hello, Don.
Come here. Give your father-in-law a hug.
No, not in the office, not in the office.
I brought the balloons for the party.
It's a brilliant idea. I've spoken to Gord and Aud, they're keen to come.
D'you remember them? They stayed with me and Paula
in the villa in Turkey last year.
Excellent. Er, sorry about this short notice.
I thought they were gonna give you a bigger office.
Ah, well, not yet.
It has been mentioned.
I think that proposal got lost on Curtis's desk.
Well, if it's been mentioned, they should see it through.
Where is Curtis? I'll remind him myself.
- Oh, no, Don, he's... not around. - Don't let him forget,
you were Relationship Manager of the Year last year, you deserve it.
Oh, hello, Curtis.
Do you remember my father-in-law, Don?
Hello there.
Yeah, nice to see you again.
You know, Murray's always saying how lucky he is to have you as a boss,
but then you're very lucky to have him.
Well, he's a very valued member of the team.
And he's a very valued member of my family.
Good. Well, I'm glad he's so valued.
In which case, why haven't you given him a bigger office?
Thanks for dropping by, Don.
He was Relationship Manager of the Year last year, you know.
Yeah, I know, I gave him the award, that's me in the photo.
Is it?
- Christ, you've put on weight! - (MURRAY LAUGHS)
I'll see you tonight, then, Don.
Yeah, all right.
See you around.
Are you all right, mate?
Quite a character.
So, how was Edinburgh?
Oh...
manic, as usual.
Weren't you meant to be there?
Oh, er, something came up.
How was the weather?
Oh, it was all right. Yeah. Rained in the afternoon.
OK. OK, and what did you do after the conference?
Oh, we went for a sushi.
Sushi. Er, where?
Wakimoto's.
And you were staying at the Radisson, weren't you?
Yes, sorry, is there a problem?
No, no, not at all.
Oh, about tonight, Bex's party,
got the message, Tamzin's really looking forward to it.
Oh, great.
It would just be better, if the whole Edinburgh thing comes up,
that I was there with you enjoying the sushi in Wakimoto's.
- You were with me? - Only if it comes up.
Right.
And obviously I was with you at the... Radisson.
Were you?
Yeah.
Thanks, mate.
It'd just be better for us if we stick to that story.
Better?
For... Tamzin...
...and me.
- OK. - Great.
- My notes from the investment conference. - Thanks, honey.
Murray.
Keeley, hi, d'you get my message?
Just wondering if you're able to bring a cake.
- Cake? - Yeah, for Bex's party tonight.
What, are you having a party tonight?
Yes, yeah.
You're having a party when Bex is moving out?
(WATER COOLER GURGLES)
- Sorry, what? - Oh, my God,
she's not told you she's leaving.
(PRINTER WHIRS)
- Not told me what? - Nothing.
Nothing to do with me, Murray, you heard nothing from me.
- Keeley. - God, I'm such a stupid bigmouth!
Murray, promise me you won't say it was me.
Keeley, what are you on about?
I hate myself, I literally want to die.
Keeley? Keeley?
Hi, Murray, you wanted to see me.
My performance review.
Oh, hi, Nereesha, yeah, yes, of course.
Er...
Can I just say before we start, I know you're going to bring up
- my recent absenteeism. - Hm?
The thing is, the reason I've been off work so much is
because of a personal problem which I need to talk to you about.
Oh, yeah, well, that's what I'm here for.
Thank you, Murray.
Because in the past, when I've come with personal issues,
I don't feel management have really listened.
Sorry, can you hold that thought, Nereesha? I'll right back. Sorry.
(RINGING TONE)
- Oh, um... - Keeley?
...it's Keeley's phone, leave a message.
Keeley, what was all that about? Can you call me back, please?
- Sorry, Nereesha, where were we? - I was just saying
that in the past, when I've come with a problem,
I don't feel management have really engaged.
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
It's almost as if they'd rather be somewhere else.
Can you hold that thought, Nereesha? I won't be a minute. Sorry, er...
(RINGING TONE)
- Bex? - Hi, this is Bex, please leave a message.
Hi, hon. I've just had a really weird chat with your sister. Can you call me...
soon? Please?
Murray?
- If now is not a good time... - No, no, like I've always said,
you can talk to me any time, you know, 24/7.
- Thank you. - Just not now. Sorry.
- I can get you a cake. - Sorry?
Well, I heard you on the phone. Would it help if I got you a cake?
Oh, that's very kind, but...
I could bring it round to your house for you, to the party.
I know where you live.
Yep? Oh, hi.
- (ALARM BUZZES) - Abby. Yeah.
I found the keys.
I'm in.
So... thanks.
I just need the alarm code.
2009, the year of my divorce from Clifford.
Make yourself at home.
But do take your shoes off at the door,
I have a strict no-shoes policy.
So, you got out of there.
Well done, girl!
God, it was hard.
- And then Barney wanted to come. - Barney?
You know, the dog.
You didn't bring it, did you? I've just had new carpets fitted.
No.
No, no, he's at home.
Sorry to be a carpet Nazi, but they cost a small fortune.
Oh, don't put anything on the hall table, it's antique.
Yeah, no problem.
God, I can't stop thinking about Murray.
Think of it as a gift to yourself.
How was he when you told him?
I haven't actually, um... told him yet.
What?
I tried writing a note and that didn't work
and then I even thought about leaving a message on the fridge.
- What? - Well, we've got these magnetic letters.
You can't leave a message on the fridge, you have to be brave and tell him,
- face to face, you can't just run away. - Abby.
Oh, God, got to go.
Abby, hi, it's Murray, Bex's other half.
We... we met at the sexual health summer barbecue.
Is she around?
- Or is she in triage? - It's nothing to do with me.
What?
I'm not getting involved.
Sorry, involved in what?
Murray, my support group are waiting.
Hello, everyone.
Sorry I'm late.
Sorry, I really do need to talk to her.
Oh, hello, are you joining the group?
No, thanks, I'm just trying to talk to her.
OK, well,
there'll be plenty of time for that later. Let me get you a cup of tea.
- No, thanks, I'm fine. - It's no trouble.
- Really, I'm OK. - How do you take your tea?
I really don't want a cup of tea, I'm not joining the group.
Well, you can always come back when you're ready.
- I don't need to come back. - We are all working through
- our anger issues together. - I don't have any anger issues.
- You take sugar in your tea? - I don't want a cup of tea!
Sorry, I, um...
I didn't mean to raise my voice.
I had trouble containing my anger until I joined the group.
Murray, the problem is between you and Bex.
- Problem? W-What problem? - We can't discuss it now,
will you please just leave?
Abby, I'm not trying to get an audience with the Pope here,
I'm just trying to see my wife.
Abby has requested that you leave.
I'd like to know where my wife is.
Come on, let's go.
Careful, fella.
Don't push.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hi, Grant.
Yes, of course I'm coming, I've invited 20 people, haven't I?
No, no, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be abrupt.
It's just... Can you let yourselves in and get cracking?
I'm not ordering you around, I'm just asking you as a friend, you know.
Because I'm at the hospital, actually.
Because I've had half my ear bitten off!
Well, not half, exactly, they're looking for it now.
Look, could you just get going?
I'll be with you as soon as they've, you know, found my... lobe.
I'm really sorry about that.
Oh, it's fine, don't worry about it.
We're doing a fingertip search for it now.
Grant?
I've put a bag of ice in the freezer.
The crisps are in the bowls, beers are in the fridge.
- I think we're in pretty good shape. - Look, have you seen Bex?
A thank you would be nice.
Yes, sorry, Grant, yeah, thank you.
I mean, I've basically set the whole party up...
And I am very grateful.
...at very short notice. - Thank you again.
Well, the fact I had to ask you for a thank you
diminishes it somewhat, don't you think?
Can I just thank you again and move on?
Yeah, please, let's move on, let's put it behind us.
OK, have you seen Bex?
No.
OK. I think we might have a problem.
I'm... I'm not sure if she's coming,
She seems to be having a slight wobble.
That would explain the note I found in the bin.
"Dear Murray, I'm going away for a bit.
"Bex."
Oh, God.
Maybe that could be the surprise of the party...
...Bex not turning up.
- Right. - What are you doing?
I'm phoning round, I'm cancelling.
Oh, great, so basically I've arranged a whole party for nothing.
She's not coming, it's a bit pointless having a party
when the person whose party... Ooh, hi, Don.
- It's Murray. - Hi, Murray, how's it going?
Oh, yeah, fine, thanks.
Actually, it's about tonight's party.
- (KNOCK ON DOOR) - We're here.
Look, outside.
- Hiya! - Hi!
No, Don, listen,
- I've got to cancel. - Open up, Murray, it's chilly out here.
- It's not worth it, Paula. - We've brought Gord and Aud.
Hi!
- Hi. - Hello, Murray.
God, what happened to your ear?
Don't worry, someone bit me, it's fine.
- What? - Is it septic, Murray?
Cos my aunt cut herself gardening and they had to amputate her whole hand.
Don't say that, Paula.
Sorry about that, Murray.
- Gord, Aud, go through, go through. - Now, look, here's Bex's present.
Ah, Paula, there's a slight problem.
She's going to love it, it's so exciting.
The one with the cello is our next-door neighbour's boy.
He got a girl pregnant at school.
We don't know that for sure, Paula. Anyway,
I thought it might lend the evening a touch of class.
Hello, come in.
- Go through, help yourself. - Get yourself a drink.
Come on, Murray, get those blinds down, we've got 40 people to hide.
What the hell am I going to do?
Tell them, tell them the truth.
Oh, so stand up in front of all these people and tell them my wife's left me.
Murray, I'm not going to be able to enjoy this party if you keep on at me.
Where have you been all day?
Everyone's running around like headless chickens looking for that memory stick.
- Emma said you had it. - Yeah, yeah, I've got it here.
Well?
Well, it was here.
Look, give it to me later.
Oh, hello, sweetheart. Here's Tamzin, Murray.
Yes, of course. Hi there, Tamzin.
- Lovely devils-on-horsebacks. - Oh, thank you, yes.
Paula did those.
Have you tried the spinach tartlets?
What, no sushi, like we had in Edinburgh?
Last night?
No, er, no sushi.
It was terrific sushi, wasn't it, Murray?
Yes, well, it's a terrific restaurant, isn't it?
Wakimoto's.
On these trips, I prefer to dine out,
it gets a bit boring just staying in the hotel, doesn't it?
The Radisson.
God, look at you two, finishing each other's sentences.
You know, sometimes I think you two are having an affair!
(GUFFAWS)
Oh, God, look at the time.
Everybody, OK, everybody, listen up.
It's 7.30, she'll be here any minute. You know the drill.
Keep it quiet, when she walks in the door, we all go, "Surprise!"
- Don... - Everybody ready?
Turn the lights off.
No, Don, please, sorry, don't turn the lights off.
There's something I need to explain about tonight.
- (DOORBELL RINGS) - Oh, she's here.
Go and let her in, Murray, we'll stay here in the dark.
Quick, quick, lights, lights!
- Hello, Murray. - Nereesha.
I'm sorry to come to your house, but you did say you'd be there for me, 24/7.
Yes, I did say that, but I'm sort of in the middle of something.
It's just that personal problem I was telling you about.
It can probably wait until tomorrow.
It's a sexual problem.
Oh, God.
My husband Steve just doesn't share my enthusiasm for sexual adventure.
ALL: Surprise!
It's Nereesha, from the bank.
Runs the Small Business desk.
A problem in bed with Steve.
All right?
OK, lights off again. Everybody ready.
- Don, don't turn the lights off. - We'll lose the surprise factor.
Don, please, there's something I need to tell you all.
(SIGHS) Bex isn't coming.
Isn't coming?
She's left me...
- What? - Oh, God!
...a message, she's left me a message,
you know, a text,
just now, on my... phone, er...
to say she's having to work late because of an emergency.
Thank God.
I thought you were telling us that Bex had left you.
No, no...
(ALL LAUGH)
What emergency?
Oh, um... um... big traffic accident.
Um... motorway pile-up.
Which motorway?
Sorry?
Which motorway? Alan and Sue haven't got here yet.
I've forgotten.
Look, let me see her text.
No, no. I've deleted it.
You said she only just sent it. Come on!
Battery on this phone is very poor,
so I tend just to delete texts as soon as I've read them.
Er...
very good model otherwise,
battery and whatnot, but...
Well, if you are thinking of changing phones,
the battery deficiencies are, perhaps, something to bear in mind.
So, anyway,
Bex said that she thinks she's gonna be tied up
at the hospital till the early hours, dealing with the...
(ALL CHEER AND EXCLAIM)
- She's... she's here! - (BARNEY BARKS)
- Hello, everyone... - You're here!
Yeah.
What's happened to your ear?
Oh, no, no, it's... it's fine.
Someone bit me...
Come here.
GUEST: Nice one!
Oh, darling, happy birthday!
(BOTTLES CLINK)
- Murray... - God, I was really worried.
I mean, you know, I've been leaving messages all day
and then Keeley said something really weird about moving out,
and Abby... I mean, what's this note all about?
Look, Murray, this isn't easy for me but...
I've been practising this speech all day. I can't remember any of it now.
Speech? Wh-What speech?
- Soil. - Soil?
I... I-I feel our marriage
is rooted in the wrong soil.
No, I've gone again.
Bex, I'm not really following you, sweetie.
I feel that the soil...
- I've been in... - (CORK POPS)
(CHEERING)
...has not been assisting my...
my... well, my growing.
Could we just drop the whole soil thing? I just...
- I've moved in with Abby. - What?!
- Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. - Is this about...
- DON: Murray! ...missing your birthday breakfast?
Well, yeah. Well, no.
The truth is, Murray, you're never around.
You're too busy with everyone else.
Murray, people are getting thirsty.
Oh, sorry, Don. Be right with you...
although I actually am with Bex at the moment, so perhaps...
Come on, you two. You're missing the party.
- We want to make a toast. - OK. All right, Dad.
- (CHEERS FROM NEXT ROOM) - Look,
you're in Bilbao next week,
the following weekend you're at the Two Peaks cycling challenge,
and then you're off on a murder-mystery weekend with Grant.
- Ooh! - Sorry.
Oh, hi, Murray.
Oh, sorry. Am I interrupting something?
- Oh, no, no, everything's good. - It's fine. I was just leaving, actually.
Just... Actually, Bex, could we just talk about...
Murray, actually, can I just have a quick word?
Sorry, Tamzin...
It's just... you know I was joking earlier about Curtis seeing someone else?
- Thing is, I reckon he is. - I really can't comment on that.
So he is.
- What makes you say that? - The look on your face.
Bex?
Murray, I've put the candles on the cake but I've probably done it all wrong.
- No, no, Keeley, you've done great. Um... - DON: Murray!
There's somebody here with another cake.
(CHEERS)
- Hello, Murray. - Emma!
Hello! Ah...
Oh, you've got two cakes, Bex. Isn't that great?
- Mmm... - Oh, yes...
(LAUGHS) EMMA: It's carrot cake, your favourite.
Thank you, Emma. Um... this is Emma, everybody.
Someone else from the Small Business desk.
There's two cakes, everyone.
- (CHEERS) - Carrot cake and...
What's this one, Keeley?
Carrot cake.
- Carrot cake! There we go. - Sorry...
I can't actually do this.
Ooh, come on, you two! Photo together.
Right, over here, in front of the orchestra.
What's wrong with you, Bex? Give him a kiss!
Kiss.
ALL: Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!
Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!
(CHEERS)
Yes...
Right, let's have some more Champagne.
Grant, could you...
And play some music! Yeah!
Trying to have a party here. Hey-hey!
- Ladies and gentlemen... - (ORCHESTRA PLAYS)
- Ladies... - Stop the music! Stop the music.
Can I just say what a lovely idea this party is?
A round of applause for the son-in-law of my dreams.
(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)
(DON CHUCKLES)
Oh!
(APPLAUSE)
Bex, if I could just add a few words...
Um... obviously, you're all here because you love Bex, as I do.
Um... in fact,
she's been the light of my life
since the day we got married 12 years ago.
Here's to the next 12!
Absolutely, Don.
And, you know, obviously, like any couple, we've had our ups and downs,
but the key to any successful marriage
is the ability of both partners to change
and I, for one, am changing.
I mean, I-I-I'm changing at work...
You know, take the management conference in Bilbao next week.
Um...
Won't be going. I'm changing in other ways.
I'm meant to be going on a murder-mystery weekend in Haywards Heath.
Not any more.
It's all about change.
Life and happiness are all about change,
and I am changing.
Thank you.
Sorry... no claps...
Perhaps maybe a toast, Murray?
Thank you, Paula. Yes, a toast. Everyone please raise your glasses
to the beautiful Bex and the changing Murray!
ALL: (HESITANTLY) To the beautiful Bex...
...and the changing Murray! - (LOUDLY) The changing Murray!
Superb speech, Murray!
Thank you. Come on, let's pick it up. Come on, pick it up.
- Play some upbeat Bach. - (ORCHESTRA PLAYS)
- Ladies and gentlemen... - Stop the music!
- Sorry, it's me again. (CHUCKLES)
Murray, you thought you had all the surprises tonight,
but the gift that Paula is about to unveil is our surprise for the both of you.
And it gives me great pleasure to present to you
this luxury beach-side villa
- on the Turkish Riviera. - (GASPS)
It is my hope that this can be a romantic getaway for the both of you
for the rest of your lives. And that's not all!
The adventure starts tonight!
- Tonight? - Yeah, the cab's outside. Come on!
Your flight leaves in two hours!
I smuggled your passports out last week and booked the tickets.
I've spoken to Curtis and the hospital, you've both got a week's holiday together.
(CHEERING)
(APPLAUSE)
DON: Right, let's get these bags in.
PAULA: I am so excited.
You get into Izmir in time for breakfast.
Don't worry. Mehmet will be waiting for you at the other end.
In you get.
Have a lovely, lovely time.
ALL: Bye!
(ALL SHOUT GOODBYE)
(PLANE FLIES OVERHEAD)
There's some Turkish festival tonight. Mehmet's gonna barbecue a goat!
Bex, you've got to tell me what's going on.
By the way, did you find that memory stick?
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